If you want to kill yourself, then kill what you don’t like. Not everything about yourself needs to go, I promise. There were aspects of myself that I had to kill. I had to kill the part of myself that never regarded other people’s feelings. I had to kill the part of myself that was always attention seeking. I had to kill the part of myself that had these expectations of what my body should look like. But I never killed the part of myself that loved to write down my feelings and create things that could help people. I never killed the part of myself that believed that there had to be more to life than the fucking bullshit I was living in. I never killed the part of myself that was happy. I never killed the parts of myself that truly matter. Now, don’t get me wrong, those good parts of myself got lost, very lost, when I was in very dark places, but they were never completely gone. When sorting through yourself and deciding what you want in the kill pile and in the live pile, try this if you’re not sure…. I know it’s cliche, but once I was told to flip a coin and whatever you’re hoping for while it’s in the air is what you should do. This has never led me astray. Plus, there are always future times that you can go back through yourself and pick and choose what you’re keeping. Don’t be afraid to start over. Some people are so scared of starting over that they won’t do anything (I used to do this). Please don’t be that person. Take the leap and become the person that you’ve always wanted to be. I always said that I wanted a new start and I wanted to be a new person and I finally am. I am reinventing myself every day. If you want something, go get it. One thing I would love to do is journal everyday and I find myself saying “well I’m just not that person”. That’s not true at all. I can be whoever I want to be. If you always wanted to be a bookworm then be one. If you always wanted to be an introvert then be one. If you always wanted to live on the edge then do it. Life is too short to sit there wondering what you can and can’t do in life. Don’t limit yourself……because I know that you were created for greatness. 💜
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